Her Royal Highness Sets Us Up...Again

Oh, sweet friends who are due in the year of a royal birth, take note.  Don’t forget to bring your favorite heels and hairdresser to the hospital. I mean, I love Kate as much as the next person, but seriously? TEN HOURS after birth she appears, radiant, as if she had happened to be passing by and dropped in to scoop up a bundle of joy. Not as if she delivered an 8-pound baby. See below (taken from people.com)

            Looking at the photos and then comparing them to George’s birth photos, I did see that she looked, oh, slightly more polished this time around. But….I am actually having trouble finding the words for this…maybe I just need one…HOW? I saw lots of comments about how she had a team of people, blah blah blah, and wanted to just say (but resisted)…yes, but SHE was the only person who DELIVERED A BABY.   No one else, as good as their intentions may have been, were able to get that child out of her and into the world, only to be tucked into what may be the most darling bonnet of all time (I loved bonnets, and SL used to wear one quite frequently, until she learned how to both untie and fling things.  It was heart crushing.).  I stared at the pictures, literally open mouthed, because I think the only things I took to the hospital were things that I would never regularly wear in public and because I was in a panic- I was already aware that you should not take your skinny jeans with you.  See a comparison pic here: 
       
            So, Princess Kate, in the event that you are reading this, I need you to understand that I am a huge fan of you and William. I mean, we led parallel lives for years. Besides the royal part.   And I understand that a lot of your job is literally maintaining a royal appearance even in the worst of circumstances. To appear glowing after giving birth? Totally normal. To appear as if you might need to stop by and do a Vogue cover on your way home from giving birth? Not.  By the way, did you do a Vogue cover on your way home? Because after careful consideration you definitely should have. If I were to ever resemble that after birth, I would definitely ask someone to put me on the cover of some magazine. 
            In the likely event you are not reading this, Princess Kate, I’m heading back to the delivery of a baby and subsequent outfit choices. I’m curious to see if this does have an affect on what we try to look like post baby. The other day someone posted on my Facebook feed that Parlor Dry Bar had come to Rex and given them a blowout. Which looked stunning- Raleigh friends, if you haven’t gotten to experience the joy of Parlor, call them up at (919) 665-9816, and book an appointment next time you have an event or if you just want to surprise your loved ones with how good you can look on a Thursday.

            But if you are unable to get them into your packed schedule because you just gave birth to a baby, are trying to figure out how to nurse, didn’t understand how much paperwork the state would make you fill out in order to take your baby home, and are just excited about having a cup of caffeinated coffee, I’m with you.  Sip your coffee, admire that sweet sleeping creature as he or she lays in your arms, and attempt to order every single thing off the room service menu as well as swipe as many extra diapers and wipes as possible.  You can also give a little thank you that when you do leave the hospital, there will be no paparazzi at the door judging how your hair looks or whether or not you are wearing shoes. Instead you can just focus on the sweet bundle that will be your own Royal Ruler. 

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