J'Espere

My Life in Something Small Current mood: confident Category: Blogging So, since the last time I posted, I have: a. fallen in love b. written a master's paper c. started training for my second marathon d. seen the mountains in two seasons e. returned to yoga after a long absence f. graduated with a Master's degree g. become the most over educated Nanny I know of h. has more time to actually think about what i want to do than at any other period of my existence. I don't think I've ever been this excited about being unemployed in my entire life. Usually i run around like crazy looking for the next gig to get me through but this time I'm determined to take it slow and figure out what it is that I'm looking for. Back in the fall all I was doing was running, putting aside all my other training and trying to seek out something that can't be found by simply moving. In the spring I was so focused on my master's paper I almost destroyed several friendships and w...

So y'all probably think I am insane. I ran 26.2 on hilly, rocky, roots everywhere terrain with named hills like "The Wheels Fall off" and "Devil's Spine". That was the 6th annual running of the Umstead Marathon. It's not a qualifier because it generally takes even elite runners more time to get through the hiking trails and up and down never-ending hills. And this was my first marathon. Prior to running a marathon I never considered myself a runner. An athlete, yes, but I only ran if it was after a ball (soccer and field hockey), someone was chasing me (soccer, field hockey, tag) or it started raining when I was on a walk. It just didn't really interest me that much. Then, when I got into triathlons I began running a very minimal amount. Everything was in 5k races, so I only had to go 3.1 miles. the first time I ran that far without stopping I definitely felt it. Now I think of that has a mere jog in the park. I started training for this in Novembe...

Actually normally I don't blame things on Friday the 13th. I mean, what are you going to do,right? Weird things happen to me all the time and Friday the 13th only rolls around occasionally. But this morning was an exception. For starters, i was going to be early to work. That never happens. I think every employer I've ever had can attest that even with my enthusiasm for various jobs and clientele, I am rarely to never early. Most of the time being there on time is a stretch for me. But this morning was different. This morning I was up, fed Nigel and Lucy, and even had time to watch part of the Westminster Show I dvr'd earlier this week (that's right, I'm not ashamed. Those dogs are freakin' adorable.) I decided I'd made the right choice in not going to the gym and giving my body a break (ran 8 yesterday). I sipped my tea and made some more for a to-go mug. I sauntered (okay I walked fast) to my car, hopped in and was able to get right on 40 without a hitch. ...

Ideally I should be writing my master's paper right now. Actually scratch that. I should be writing my master's paper every waking second I"m not working on something more important. Like blogging or constantly updating my Facebook status. So here it is. Blogging. I'll be a dork and say I had an amazing weekend. I think that everything about it was perfect, from company to spending time in the mountains to playing Taboo slightly drunk. And I realized that I like how old I am, and I like where I am right now. But will not continue to like it if I don't finish this degree and move on to the next thing. Master's papers do something weird to your head. Like you start overanalyzing your life and begin home and self improvement projects like you would not believe. I am dealing with it by planning summer trips, vaguely job searching and playing with paint chips as well as using my drill (best money spent in '07!). Instead of working on sorting data and building ...

So I'm heading towards running my first 26.2 in just a few weeks. Which is frightening on so many levels I have a hard time describing it. So I'm sticking to what I know about. Which is that I'm hungry, I'm tired, and stretch a lot more than usual (if y'all can believe that). But I also, strangely, feel more euphoric than I ever have. I have finally discovered the runners high. For me, that apparently only happens when I have run at least 7 miles and sometimes takes until 9. Depressing. But doable. And I get to eat afterwards. And during on some runs. I'm way past the halfway point now, and it's too late to drop out of the race (though it's undetermined as of yet if I will drop in the race). I'm beginning to listen to my body more. I think the last time I legitimately did that was when I danced, and there were good reasons behind it. I listened when I felt tired, and went harder when I felt great. I ate really well, and slept a ton, and soaked my...

since I talked about things that made me laugh. While walking, riding, driving, eavesdropping, you name it. So that's what I'm using today's blog for. 1) American Idol auditions- they started last week, and I can't stop laughing. Or simply sitting in stunned silence. Ever. Even though I think that sometimes I wish I were talented enough to audition. But do I know enough covers? I thought about what I sing currently: "Mexico" by Jump Little Children, "Love Song" by Sara Bareilles, "Seventeen Forever" by Metro Station, "Loser" by Beck, "Great Salt Lake", Band of Horses, "Everything is Okay" by the Everybodyfields, "High Voltage", Electric Six. I can imagine the response I would get to any of those. "Darling, you have a very..... sweet? temperament, but really, you sound like a hippopotamus drowing". 2) The "Failed Stripper" video on YouTube. If you haven't seen it, watch it. ri...

Harriet Aronson Burton, August 14, 1916- January 12, 2009 She was one of the most important people in my life. I understand that not everyone is close to their grandparents, and not everyone even has a chance to get to know them, but I did and I was. She was one of my best friends. Thinking about her not being in my life anymore is so hard. I always felt that when we spoke she knew what I wasn't telling her, and understood why i was keeping it to myself. At the funeral, watching my family gather around to say goodbye to the glue of who we are, I couldn't believe that the small marble box was all that was left of her. I couldnt believe that I would never see her again, that I would not make a special trip towards her apartment before going to my parents house. And now I worry- did I tell her I loved her enough? Did she know that? She said we were a lot alike, and I am very much like an aunt who died when I was young, but did I really understand that? Do I now? I didn't see ...