Sleep
When I was pregnant, people started talking to me about sleep. I heard lots of advice about sleeping as much as possible, sleeping when the baby sleeps, etc. And it wasn’t that I didn’t believe them, or that I didn’t think sleep was important. It was just that it was already getting hard. You have someone literally kicking you from the inside at 3:30 a.m. No. You are NOT sleeping. The advantage of it is that you know in advance what kind of baby you’re getting- they are divided into diurnal and nocturnal, and ours is the latter.
When SL arrived, I heard more sleep advice. Really sound advice. Like, sleep when the baby sleeps. Again, awesome. Except our sweet baby isn’t a fan. She slept for the first 3 days (I remember idiotically telling my husband we would probably always have to wake her up to eat because she was such a sound sleeper. I remember even more idiotically waking her up.NEVER AGAIN.), and then she realized that if she was awake, there would always be someone available to hang out with her. So she stays awake, smiling, staring at you with the most gorgeous blue eyes you’ve ever seen, or sniffling and crying (she has an incredible frowny face). Which is why we hold her so often- more on that at a later time.
I remember the way sleeping felt. And I am definitely a sleeper, and I love a good rester. I could easily go 8 or 9 hours at night plus a good nap in the afternoon, and could never figure out why naps go away in elementary school. They’re really more necessary in middle and high school, right? And college, and obviously in adulthood. I especially love European countries that shut down for a long afternoon lunch and siesta. Why doesn’t the U.S. get on board with that?
Anyway, back to the days of my pregnancy. I could nap pretty much anytime, and did. The best part was that no one would dare say anything. If you’re growing a human, people are kind, caring, and understanding if you sit down and get up three times during a meeting, nap on the sofa at 6 p.m., nap on the sofa at 10 a.m. on a Saturday, eat 3 cupcakes at a party and hunt for water. Once you have that baby, there are no guarantees. I will say I sometimes continue to pull the newborn card, even though SL is now technically an “infant”. I actually remember the last time I had a 3 hour nap. It was amazing, when I was 9 months pregnant and too hot and sticky to do anything. I laid down, had the fan going, and slept until I woke up. I repeat: AMAZING. And regardless of your personal feelings on the nap, if you do not have kids, you need to go take one. Think of it as “pouring one for your homies”.
Occasionally I do catch a nap. Recently SL went down for THREE HOURS STRAIGHT. Naturally it took me 45 minutes to realize that this was a real nap, no 5 minute power nap and then I did what any parent would do- I panicked. I jumped up from my chair where I was absently flipping through House Beautiful and wondering why none of the houses, even ones with kids, ever show toys sitting in the living spaces or kitchens. I rushed into the kitchen, naturally assuming I should eat something because I had two hands. Then I panicked and thought maybe I should be downstairs working on laundry. Then I realized, just to test the power of this nap, I too could lay down and sleep. So I crept upstairs, peeked in to see that SL was still sleeping. She was. I cautiously laid down on the bed, aware that she can sense my head hitting a pillow. I listened. Nothing. I cut on the video feed. Still asleep.
Even more cautiously I closed my eyes, and then…I slept. For real. I woke up an hour later thinking somehow I had missed SL crying, and therefore psychologically damaged her for life. But when I checked, our girl was still passed out. So I went downstairs and did a short workout. Still sleeping. I came back upstairs and showered and got dressed in actual people clothes. And I thought, this is what it’s like when people say “sleeping like a baby”. This was a recent occurrence and hasn’t been repeated. I called M at work and told him about the nap, and how I thought we were turning a corner and she was going to start doing this on a regular basis, but so far it hasn’t even happened twice. Sometimes I find myself actually dreaming about sleeping. Really.
It’s the most experimental part of parenting, in my world. Something happens and I think it’s going to be a routine part of our day, and then it never happens again. I shouldn’t say never. Obviously at some point SL is going to “give up the ghost” and go to sleep (saying is from my grandmother). Sleep is important, and baby sleep is especially important (for babies and parents!!). * Side Note: As I finish writing this, my night involved hanging out with SL until 1 a.m.. On a school night.
When SL arrived, I heard more sleep advice. Really sound advice. Like, sleep when the baby sleeps. Again, awesome. Except our sweet baby isn’t a fan. She slept for the first 3 days (I remember idiotically telling my husband we would probably always have to wake her up to eat because she was such a sound sleeper. I remember even more idiotically waking her up.NEVER AGAIN.), and then she realized that if she was awake, there would always be someone available to hang out with her. So she stays awake, smiling, staring at you with the most gorgeous blue eyes you’ve ever seen, or sniffling and crying (she has an incredible frowny face). Which is why we hold her so often- more on that at a later time.
I remember the way sleeping felt. And I am definitely a sleeper, and I love a good rester. I could easily go 8 or 9 hours at night plus a good nap in the afternoon, and could never figure out why naps go away in elementary school. They’re really more necessary in middle and high school, right? And college, and obviously in adulthood. I especially love European countries that shut down for a long afternoon lunch and siesta. Why doesn’t the U.S. get on board with that?
Anyway, back to the days of my pregnancy. I could nap pretty much anytime, and did. The best part was that no one would dare say anything. If you’re growing a human, people are kind, caring, and understanding if you sit down and get up three times during a meeting, nap on the sofa at 6 p.m., nap on the sofa at 10 a.m. on a Saturday, eat 3 cupcakes at a party and hunt for water. Once you have that baby, there are no guarantees. I will say I sometimes continue to pull the newborn card, even though SL is now technically an “infant”. I actually remember the last time I had a 3 hour nap. It was amazing, when I was 9 months pregnant and too hot and sticky to do anything. I laid down, had the fan going, and slept until I woke up. I repeat: AMAZING. And regardless of your personal feelings on the nap, if you do not have kids, you need to go take one. Think of it as “pouring one for your homies”.
Occasionally I do catch a nap. Recently SL went down for THREE HOURS STRAIGHT. Naturally it took me 45 minutes to realize that this was a real nap, no 5 minute power nap and then I did what any parent would do- I panicked. I jumped up from my chair where I was absently flipping through House Beautiful and wondering why none of the houses, even ones with kids, ever show toys sitting in the living spaces or kitchens. I rushed into the kitchen, naturally assuming I should eat something because I had two hands. Then I panicked and thought maybe I should be downstairs working on laundry. Then I realized, just to test the power of this nap, I too could lay down and sleep. So I crept upstairs, peeked in to see that SL was still sleeping. She was. I cautiously laid down on the bed, aware that she can sense my head hitting a pillow. I listened. Nothing. I cut on the video feed. Still asleep.
Even more cautiously I closed my eyes, and then…I slept. For real. I woke up an hour later thinking somehow I had missed SL crying, and therefore psychologically damaged her for life. But when I checked, our girl was still passed out. So I went downstairs and did a short workout. Still sleeping. I came back upstairs and showered and got dressed in actual people clothes. And I thought, this is what it’s like when people say “sleeping like a baby”. This was a recent occurrence and hasn’t been repeated. I called M at work and told him about the nap, and how I thought we were turning a corner and she was going to start doing this on a regular basis, but so far it hasn’t even happened twice. Sometimes I find myself actually dreaming about sleeping. Really.
It’s the most experimental part of parenting, in my world. Something happens and I think it’s going to be a routine part of our day, and then it never happens again. I shouldn’t say never. Obviously at some point SL is going to “give up the ghost” and go to sleep (saying is from my grandmother). Sleep is important, and baby sleep is especially important (for babies and parents!!). * Side Note: As I finish writing this, my night involved hanging out with SL until 1 a.m.. On a school night.
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