Week 29: Baby Robbins is a Butternut Squash!

At just over 2.5 pounds, the baby is all over the place internally. What I’ve noticed that’s strangest to me is that all the eating I was doing a couple of weeks ago has essentially ceased. There are times when I feel like I should be hungry, but also feel like nothing will fit into my stomach. I had 2 thoughts about this: 1. The Baby is pushing up on it? Is that possible? 2. Is this how people feel after gastric by-pass? They want to eat but it won’t fit? There are so many people in our lives giving us advice, and for the most part it’s really great. The part I’m not understanding is when they say “Rest while you can! Change is coming!” Because I feel like our lives (or at least mine) has already completely changed. For instance: I have a weird back twinge going on. It’s on my right side. In case you’re wondering, this is completely normal (as is everything else, right?). On my left side, my hip is usually killing me. So at night, I try to balance by sleeping some on my left side and some on my right side. This week, however, when I sleep on my left it’s hardcore pain in the hip, and when I sleep on the right, it’s hardcore pain in the back, and Sweet Pea is just flipping around like it’s her job. I was totally expecting this, by the way, just not in month 7. I was thinking it would be more of a month 9 thing. I think what I thought was that I could have expectations for pregnancy. And it turns out, you can’t. As many educators know, we come with a Type-A personality, and tend to want things our way- when we want them, how we want them, and what they should turn out to be. But with pregnancy (and also with babies, of course) it’s not necessarily going to go our way. Otherwise every woman would clearly look like Heidi Klum did eight weeks after giving birth. No one’s going to choose to hang on to an extra 20 pounds just for fun. Par example, I thought I’d run the whole time. Sure, I figured that again by magic month 9 I might be slowing down (or speeding up according to some women) but overall I thought I would run consistently to the end. I love to run. You should (if you are normal and healthy) be able to do pretty much the same activities during pregnancy that you did before (no worries- hot yoga ended immediately for me), but it turns out it doesn’t really work that way. Yesterday when I was running, I felt the weight of the world on my…pelvis. And legs, and feet. So I ended up walking. By the way, my WALKING time has slowed by almost a minute- what is that about? What’s going to happen when I’m pushing 50 pounds of stroller in front of me? It’ll take all morning to get around the block! So I’m letting running go. Well, not really, but I’m letting go of the mileage. No more obsession with getting in 20 miles or busting. The busting part actually seems much more likely at this point. I’m still walking (tons), doing other cardio (spin, elliptical), lifting, and then, LISTENING. Like when my body says, “Hey, you need to sit down”, instead of telling it to wait just another half an hour, I am practicing sitting. The other part of pregnancy that has been a struggle has been maternity clothes. I feel like I’ve spent a ton of money on clothes and don’t really have that many. Until yesterday I was racking my brain, trying to figure out why this was. When it occurred to me that I have been building an adult wardrobe for about the last 8 years. Some pieces go out, new ones come in, and then there are the staples. But when you’re pregnant, none of it fits anymore. You are literally starting from scratch- down to underwear (sorry, that was a bit graphic but shockingly true). All of a sudden, when you’re complaining to your husband about not having anything cute to wear out, it’s because you really don’t have anything cute to wear out. On my way to work this morning I was trying to calculate the estimated value of my pre-pregnancy wardrobe. I’m guessing in the thousands. Who knows how much money of mine is floating around H&M and J. Crew? But now, I’m in a situation where I still have quite a ways to go, no way to predict what I’m going to want to wear in a few weeks or what will appropriately cover my belly, and nothing to wear. It’s the most bizarre feeling. It kind of makes you feel naked (isn’t that ironic…). So that’s been a tough one to swallow. I longingly look at my beautiful summer dresses and shirts and skirts, and realize I can’t fit into any of them. So this weekend, go look in your closet. Admire your style and taste and that piece you picked up for like 70% off that would have been $800 or whatever and smile. Admire your ability to coordinate outfits and collect pieces. Because you can (hopefully) still wear them. Better yet, pick out something and wear it in honor of pregnant women everywhere, who, trust me, would love to be the girl who didn’t need maternity clothes until magic month 9. I am the girl who will wear the maternity clothes with pride (hello, maxi dress!) and say, "You're right, I'm not due until July." If Princess Kate can do it, so can I.